Meet (Coyote) Christina Smith Larney | Surfer, Author & Dream Weaver

We had the good fortune of connecting with (Coyote) Christina Smith Larney and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Coyote Christina, is your business focused on helping the community? If so, how?

TKCdreams supports and inspires the community by providing resources to heal, grow & thrive that open new ways of being and relating in the world — more specifically, TKCdreams:

1/ provides personal resources to heal & grow
2/ moves participants toward joy and self determination
3/ provides a community space to heal, grow & thrive
4/ provides safe spaces to heal, grow & thrive
5/ inspires participants to find, follow & build the life of the their dreams
6/ builds self esteem and self awareness through activity-based learning and self reflection
and
7/ opens avenues of self transformation that can lead to new ways of being & relating in the world that are more connected.

TKCdreams provides safe spaces either online, through art or next to the sea that support participants in their journey to heal, grow and thrive. Offerings include online classes and in-person workshops and retreats — resources that are much needed at a time when so many of us are carrying grief and heartbreak that has generally been amplified by COVID and all the added loss it has brought on a societal level – local, national & global, as well as on a personal level for many.

TKCdreams’ online classes, in-person workshops and retreats encourage participants to learn about new personal resources to heal, grow and thrive or to try new activities — like surfing! — while also providing rejuvenating activities like yoga, relaxation, meditation and journaling practices. We focus on activity-based learning and healing arts approaches that encourage self reflection and lead to self transformation.

Our offerings support a common desire to transform our personal lives and create new ways of being and relating in the world that move us toward the life of our dreams together. The path of self transformation and growth can change the way we see ourselves and our place in the world and this changes the way we relate to others.

We welcome participants to become a part of the ‘TKCdreams Team’ with a mission to inspire and empower others to find, follow and build the life of our dreams one day at time.

Can you open up a bit about your work and career? We’re big fans and we’d love for our community to learn more about your work.

Yes, I would love to share — I’m pretty much an ‘open book’. I think the thing that sets me apart is that I am a big dreamer with a big heart and have a very active and creative imagination. When I took the Clifton Strengths Talent Assessment in 2018, my top 5 strengths were: Learner, Ideation, Intellection, Input and Strategic.

I am continually coming up with ‘ideas’ and businesses with the goal of making the world and the ways we function in the world more kind, caring and sustainable. Building the life of our dreams is a creative endeavor. We are all ‘creative’ — we are creating our lives every day either by default or by design (borrowed from the ‘Dreambuilder Program’ w/ the Brave Thinking Institute/Mary Morrissey). Living the life of our dreams does not happen by chance, it happens when we decide to look inward for our truth and when we find the courage to dig deep enough to discover our greatest desire. Often we discover that our greatest desire isn’t a big house or fancy car or prince/princess charming to ride off into the sunset with or endless, glassy waves to ride or a bank account w/ seven figures or more.

While any of these would be lovely, if we dig deep enough, we may find that our greatest desire isn’t one of the multitude of material items that a world based in consumption, continual growth and consumerism tells us we need to be happy or cool or ‘good enough’. We may find that all we truly desire is to be loved and accepted for who we are — faults and all, and to have the freedom to pursue self determination, to be our own master. When I looked inward, I found that my biggest desire was simply to be loved and adored for my quirky, beautiful, ridiculous, sensitive, dreamer self. I wanted to be ALL of me — too much and too little.

I have walked the path and now I’m ready to talk the talk. I have taken the inner journey, found my greatest desire and it led me to the life of my dreams — living 2.5 miles from the beach and going to the beach daily and surfing as much as possible (sometimes daily as well!). Now I am working to support others on their journey.

My life is my art and art is my therapy. Writing and poetry saved my soul; yoga and asana practice provided a deep, caring connection to my body; and surfing is my passion. I’m super excited to be launching my business — TKCdreams — that will allow me to share my life ‘art’ with others. The main goal of the business is to support others on their journey to heal, grow and thrive and the overall mission of TKCdreams is to inspire and empower others to find, follow and build the life of their dreams one day at a time. This can be done through the self transformation that comes when we turn our attention inward and begin to build our awareness through self reflection and by planning and acting according to our deepest desires and beliefs — desires and beliefs that align with our souls and the truth deep within.

Writing my first book, To Kill A Coyote (TKC), was the first step in building the life of my dreams — not just wanting & wishing, or hoping and praying for life to provide me my dreams, but planning and acting to bring my ideas and dreams into the material world. I believe strongly in the power or art to heal and save lives. Writing saved my life during my darkest hours and my love of nature and the connection I have always felt with the natural world provided the comfort I needed to feel loved and beautiful. I reasoned that if I was a part of creation, I was beautiful (by the transitive property) and I am never alone in being a part of the majestic creation that surrounds us.

It is in the wild — in the colors of the sunset and sunrise, in the majestic landscapes of open fields, mountain ranges and by the sea, that I found refuge and salvation, not in the religion of my youth that condemned my soul and labeled me a sinner; and, as a girl, I was relegated to be a human giver, a second class citizen based solely on my biological features. I was a girl, I became a woman. My place was in the home, my birthright was to submit, and I should deny any crazy belief that I could be anything more than barefoot and pregnant in service of another, specifically in service to the biological males in the world – dads, brothers, one-day husbands.

I got where I am today by being true to my heart and soul and by never letting go of my dreams. I had to untangle from the beliefs that I had never consciously believed but that had become a part of me through my lived experience, mainly in childhood. I never believed these tenants, I never felt ‘discriminated’ against as a girl, as a woman, but in my second year of law school — at the age of 35 — when voices in my head started to say, “Who do you think you are?”, “You are a woman, you can’t make it in a man’s world.”, “You should be barefoot and pregnant.”, I found out that the patriarchy embedded in religion and in our society may be subtle at times, subtle enough that I didn’t notice my indoctrination, but powerful enough to fight against my soul’s desire for self determination when I took the initiative to be more than a submissive woman and made a conscious decision to attend law school in my mid 30s, the audacity.

I found that you don’t have to consciously believe in the tenants of a power structure to fall under its influence. If you live it, it becomes a part of you and you have to unlearn the negative messaging that denies not only your right, but every person’s inherent right to self determination by prescribing classes of people and labeling large groups as worthy in general and others unworthy, especially those who question or who are not willing to follow the main premises of the power structure.

Writing allowed me to identify, address and change my negative self beliefs and to overcome the doubt that was created by the voices in my head. I got curious and writing was the main vehicle for leading me away from the fate of a woman and the pain of a little girl and toward the life of my dreams, to the sea of destiny where I am able to embrace self determination and find the resources to build the life of my dreams. As a healthy adult, no longer controlled by the unspoken tenants of patriarchy or the primal needs and feelings of a child, I am free to choose my own path — I am free to live and build the life of my dreams and you can too!

At times I question, “What took so long? Why didn’t I launch TKCdreams sooner or why didn’t I move to the beach and start surfing as soon as I graduated college in 1994!?” These questions aren’t really important at this point. What is important is I DID IT!; and 2024 seems like as good of time as any — no better time than now.

I’m very grateful for the life I am living and to have this opportunity to share my life passions with others by launching TKCdreams and offering online classes and in-person workshops and retreats. The second phase of the launch will focus on art and nature with the ultimate goal of opening a community art gallery and holding live mural paintings. TKCdreams strives to create new ways of being and relating in the world with the ultimate goal of creating a more kind, caring and sustainable world, starting with our own self transformation:

If you want to awaken
all of humanity
then awaken
all of yourself

If you want to eliminate
the suffering in
the world, then
eliminate all that is dark
and negative in yourself

Truly, the greatest gift
you have to
give is that of your
own self-transformation.
– Lao Tzu

Let’s say your best friend was visiting the area and you wanted to show them the best time ever. Where would you take them? Give us a little itinerary – say it was a week long trip, where would you eat, drink, visit, hang out, etc.

We would start @ Folly Beach! with sunrise/sunset beach walks & surfing!, a midnight walk on the Ravenel Bridge w/ a nice, sea breeze & a sky full of stars and not too much traffic. Chico Feo, Jack of Cups & Lost Dog Cafe on Folly for eating & chilling — plus, Dead Low Coffee and maybe a ‘dark-n-shady’ drink at LowLife. The burgers (1/2 price on WED) at Bohemian Bull along with the friendly staff are a must as well as Crosby’s seafood market & food truck just off Folly with fresh ‘off the boat’ offerings, Chubby Fish for a top notch seafood meal, Angel Oak & the majesty of this ancient oak tree that calms your being almost as much as the waves at the beach, Sullivan’s Island & Bearded Cat for gelato as well as a beach walk, ride the water taxi around for a day/afternoon & check out the new International African American Museum, stroll around the market in downtown Charleston & walk along the riverfont down to the Battery and check out the Robert Lange Gallery @ 2 Queen St and book a massage/acupuncture treatment at the Healing Gallery on Queen St as well. Then, we can keep going on Queen St for coffee @ Harken and then a delicious sandwich &/or crepes at Queen St Grocey Cafe. We would also catch some live music at the Charleston Pour House as well as 9.30 am yoga w/ Kate Counts on the deck every SUN followed by live music & the market out back, catching a Gritty Flyright show (local country/blues singer/band) and MoonkatDaddi show (local rap & hip hop artist mixing up some great classic rock & making it relevant/relatable to a new generation/wider audience!) and the cover band High Society to dance to some 90s Hip Hop & Rap, and then to eat/for coffee: Huriyali, Muddy Waters, Kudu, Odyssey Bottle Shop & Hifalutin Coffee Shops/Cafes and defs wanna stop by the Buena Company Empanadilla Food Truck for some amazing Puerto Rican food!

Who else deserves some credit and recognition?

So many inspirations and support in my life. Gotta start with mom. She’s an amazing mom, not perfect, but has always provided unconditional love and support and was a very caring and thoughtful mom and I can never ‘repay’ her for all she did for me and that she continues to do for the family. She gave me roots soaked in love and never held me back from pursuing my dreams — a little girl from Iowa who wanted to fly (& surf!) . . . a small-town girl who grew up in Iowa, dreaming of living by the ocean and becoming a surfer, a little girl who wanted to change the world.

Then dad, losing him to brain damage and the rest of my family to the emotional void his loss created in 1976 when I was 4&1/2 years old (my sisters were 7 & 9, mom was 30) has shaped me more than I will ever know, pretty sure. The silver lining is that I have never taken life or health for granted and I could never ‘be comfortable’ with ‘waiting for retirement’ when my dad lost so much at age 33 — partial lobotomy of the L hemisphere of his brain. He wasn’t supposed to live through the night, he was never supposed to walk again. He lived for almost 44 years — paralyzed on the R side of his body, unable to read, write, talk in full sentences or hold a discussion. He lived a pretty amazing quality of life for his condition and was an amazing man who could laugh & cry & who I came to admire and love after the initial shock (maybe around 10yrs old, definitely by my teenage years) and always will. He became my hero and was an amazing man but that little girl just wanted her dad. The trauma of his accident probably made me the dreamer I am and most likely spurred my large imagination and creativity — it has made me the ideas person & life-long learner that I am today.

I have had and continue to find many close friends — some for ‘seasons’ some for most my life and too many to be able to name each but I’m pretty sure they know who they are and I tell them at least once a year, probably more, how much their support and friendship means to me. My peeps from high school and our common connection of growing up in a small town together, my Princeton University friends & teammates (when you first realize that friends are the family you choose), my Denver friends and the CB & Omaha crew and a few law school friends and most recently my Charleston bffs and soulmates. Their love, support and encouragement have gotten my through some very dark times and their continued love, support and encouragement are vital in my life.

My family — sisters, nieces, cousins, aunts & uncles, all the ‘great’ nieces & nephews, love them all and always thankful for the time I get to share with them and for the life-long connections and challenges that we go through to be able to be true to ourselves and remain a part of a diverse family with very different life philosophies. They are my inspiration and their love has been vital and is probably the main reason I made it through some of those dark times as well.

My mentors have mainly been writers/books:
Anodea Judith, Eastern Body, Western Mind: Psychology and the Chakra System As a Path to the Self
David Carson & Jamie Sams, Medicine Cards
Pema Chodron, When Things Fall Apart (WTF!A)
Clarissa Pinkoles Estes, Women Who Run w/ the Wolves
Rodney Smith, Stepping Out of Self-Deception: The Buddha’s Liberating Teaching of No-Self
Joseph Campbell, The Hero with a Thousand Faces
Constantine P. Cavafy, poems: Ithaka, The God Abandons Antony, Che Face . . . Il Gran Rifiuto, The Footsteps & Waiting for the Barbarians & other great poems!
Robert Sapolsky, Behave: The Biology of Humans at Our Best and Worst

And more recently some podcasts:
Hubermanlab w/ Andrew Huberman
On Being w/ Krista Tippett
Mindscape w/ Sean Carroll
Scene on Radio w/ John Biewen+ co hosts

And that amazing little girl who refused to be overcome by the grief, whose pain was buried for 30+ years, a part of me that was shut away by my body at a time when my frame was too small to carry such intense emotions and my brain was not fully developed and could not process the pain and confusion of losing my dad but also having a disabled dad, it’s hard to articulate to this day. It was an act of survival and by all outward appearance I was ‘thriving’. It wasn’t until my marriage started crumbling away when I was in my mid-30s and attending law school that I became aware of all the stored grief and painful emotions from childhood.

I have learned, and I am still learning, how to love and support that child deep within who felt so alone and abandoned — the pain was so great that she longed for death because there was no one emotionally & physically present to hold her and tell her everything was gonna be alright. I hold her in my mind’s eye, deep within where she is safe, and tell her she is loved and beautiful and that I am always here for her — I can help hold her grief, it is ok to cry. That beautiful, little girl developed a hunger for adventure, turned her sails to the horizon and pursued her dreams.

Website: https://tkcdreams.net

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/surfsaltsoulretreat/ https://www.instagram.com/tkcdreams/

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christina-smith-larney-esq-26b89714/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CJLarney

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCnyDS7V37X7ozjIKMCnzMJQ

Other: www.tokillacoyote.com (this was the website i built in 2016 when I self-published TKC but I never did any marketing . . .)

Image Credits
Goose & I on my surf board – Guiding Light Drones, Sydney Meyer, all other photos I took or were taken w/ my camera by a friend.